a chin on your knee.

As we work through the multiple layers of sadness this week and into the weeks and months to come, one thing that helps peel them away bitbybit is recalling all the fond memories we have of Wrigley—memories that we'll have forever. In keeping with one of my favorite childhood books, The Tenth Good Thing About Barney, we've been keeping a list of things we love about Wrigley. Needless to say, we're way past 10.

I will post that list when the time feels right.

What I miss most, right now at least, is his physical presence. The pawing at the back door when I come home. The chin on my knee as I'm eating. The "pffft" in my face as he stood by my side of the bed to wake me. Twiddling his ear, scratching his throat or chest or flank. The simple nearness of him.

He's still very near, in my heart. It's just that it's hard to reach inside and give my heart a good scratch.

a round of golf

Our buddy Wrigley always loved golf. When I would pull out a golf club, he made a distinctive woof that we referred to as "the sports bark." He loved when I would chip golf balls in the yard and he'd go chase the balls down. Occasionally, he would actually bring them back. But it was more fun to chew on them and stash them someplace of his choosing.

Yesterday, I went out to play a round. We always talked about how fun it would be to take Wrigley out on the golf course, knowing full well that his golf etiquette wouldn't even qualify him for a muni! But yesterday was a good day to bring him along. He and I talked the whole way. We talked about the targets we would try to hit, reading the putts, and generally keeping our swing on line. When I made a good shot, he said "woof, woof - good shot guy!" When I hit it into the rough, he said "don't worry, I'll get it." When I missed a putt, he said "don't worry guy, we'll get it back." When I birdied 4 holes, he told all his buddies "that's my guy - he's a champ, woof!"

I shot an 81, which was my best score in a long, long time. Wrigley keeps on giving. Thanks buddy.

woof.

God called Wrigley to come about 9:00 last night, Sunday, April 18.

We are at peace for him, but filled with a deep, profound and engulfing grief for ourselves.

the boy.

These are tough days for The Boy Wig. A nasty fever, combined with weakness in his hind end, sent us to see Dr. Bev on Tuesday, and after a day of fluids and antibiotics failed to knock down the fever, she sent us packing to MedVets in Columbus. It was a late night for us, and we left the boy in their care overnight.

He looked pathetic: pink with fever, shaking, lethargic, lying on his side and not even lifting his head when we came to tell him goodnight and that we'd be back soon to take him home. The next day, an abdominal ultrasound turned up nothing, though the fever stayed high. They brought in a neurologist to consult, and discovered some dismaying signs that may indicate a stroke.

Friday, though, Wrigley staged a comeback, and rallied to a hearty appetite and a spark in his eyes. The doctor who spoke with Rob seemed a bit surprised at his turnaround. So Rob dropped what he was doing and sped up to Columbus to retrieve our friend. (We're planning a fundraising effort soon.)

The past few days have brought many, many tears on both our parts (and Mom's, too). I'm incredibly thankful that I'm going through this with both of them. Rob is a tremendous partner and comfort when things get rocky, and an amazing friend when life is good.

Wrigley spent today sleeping very deeply. He's gobbled up dog food, pita bread, whole-wheat English muffin with peanut butter, boiled chicken, cracker, Jump & Sit Bits and lots of meds.

Tuesday, he is scheduled for an MRI, during which the doctor will look for signs of a stroke, or several, or perhaps tumors. The best case scenario, actually, would be a stroke -- dogs, we're told, typically recover nicely from a stroke. But we're not thinking of that now. We're giving him lots of snacks and scratches, relishing the mere fact of his company.

sprung!

As of today, April 10, spring has sprung. In a big way.

Watching The Masters is a rite of springtime passage for Rob and me, and usually we watch the hallowed grounds of Augusta National, with its gorgeous azaleas and rhododendrons, and sigh longingly, knowing that our own spring bloom is another couple of weeks away.

Not this year.

After a brutally cold and snowy February and early March, Mother Nature decided that she, too, was sick of the cold and gray and threw the Spring Switch. Suddenly, almost overnight, we went from cloudy and 30 degrees to sunny and 70. We missed the usual stretch of 50–60 degree days ... sweatshirt-and-shorts weather. Instead, we blew full-on into early summer.

We opened the Side Porch Cafe weeks early, and had our first dinner al fresco last weekend. We spent today in the sunshine, spreading mulch (a job that's often done in cool temps).

Typically, spring brings a gradual awakening of the landscape: first, the weeping cherry blooms like a cheap prom dress, then the flowering crabapple, then the dogwoods come a week or two later. This year, the early magnolias and cherry trees are blooming right alongside the later dogwood and redbud. It's all happening at once. It's magnificent (and allergen-laden), but a bit disconcerting.

While I welcome the early patch of warm weather, it is compressing the spring growing season, and I fear that I'll blink and miss it.

I need to do a better job this spring of looking around and taking it all in.

spc.

Today, April 1, the temp hit 80 degrees. It's a Thursday. Rob is on hiatus, and I've decided it just isn't in the cards for me to go into the office tomorrow. It's the official 2010 debut of the Side Porch Cafe.

It's a glorious evening: we've chowed down on leftover party food from last night's get-together with Rob's former colleagues. The party was fantastic: good food, copious wine (today reminded me of going to class hung over during Little 500 week at I.U.) and great people. What amazed me, as always, was the genuine respect, friendship and admiration that Rob and his co-workers share(d). People think he's really neat. I think he's really neat.

Wrigley scored big-time from a few folks who kept sneaking tortilla chips and pita bread to him. Tonight, we went for a really long walk. Wigs was tired by the end, but then, so were we.

Life is good. It's good. It's April 1, and we have the house open. Spring is here. It's like winter never even happened. I think I have a new mom's amnesia for the pain of childbirth ... I can't even remember how awful February was, and it seems like the Side Porch Cafe has been in continuous operation forever.

Forever.